hahahah im not emoing dont worry, i just feel really lonely here. all by myself. im not sad. but just always alone, with nothing to do, no one to talk to, i mean how long can MSN keep me company right? and i never liked to be alone on my own. oh, grams went to genting, mom and sis went to work, its all me alone. in this small and cold little room. eating myself. playing myself. ya.. very pathetic. i know that. LOL
well, what to do, its not like i have a choice. i have to stay here, how nice if someone could really come by and surprise me =) AHAHAHAHAH!!! okie... im done making myself seem so pathetic. thats all! =)
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Song Fest.
hey guys, i just wanna randomly update about whats going on in my life now, well, im currently buzy, in somethings, and of course, Song fest, in charging of song fest is really hard, though im not the one conducting, but sometimes, when the conductor is not coming then i have to, which makes it really difficult for me, and i dont even know how to conduct anything at all,
so i already foresee things like lack of discipline during practices and distractions, and these things can easily get you angry. especially when ppl dont listen to you, you have to keep raising up your voice. maybe until u can loose your voice too. and one more thing, complaints. members will tend to complain about stuffs like hungry, or tired. or something else, well, that i understand. so to all you who are singing on song fest. pls dont complain, or get distracted or wander around with your chats or gossips. if its hard enough for u to come for practice, its even harder for the person in charge and the conductor to come for practice. especially when all you dont listen. so be more considerate. and the last thing that i want to do is to scold my members, but i gotta say, they're making it awfully difficult.
and always remember song fest are for saving souls, and praising God. not for your own glory.
and of course some TIPS, would be great wouldn't it? ok, guys, always remember, sing from your diaphragm. dont sing from your throat or your nose, if u sing from ur nose, you will sound like a duck, if you sing from ur throat, you sound like you're being strangled.
and i know you guys would always forget to use ur diaphragm. and of coz, know and understand the lyrics, know what you're singing, and why are you singing, set. your. motives. right.
and expressions, happy for happy songs, hopeful, sad, brave. and of course the sound of your voice, when your voice have to be powerful, the only way is your diaphragm. if u use ur throat. you'll sound like shouting. and that wouldnt be very nice. and for sopranos, make sure every high notes you reach, make sure your voice is ROUND. if its sharp and squeeky like a rubber duck, that thats not really pleasent to the judges's ears.
and last, this is very important, get used to looking at your CONDUCTOR! coz he/she will be giving you the counts of when to come in and all. and your expressions you voice so even when you're practicing, dont hold the paper up high until it cover's ur face. my members does that alot. and if they would even listen to me, they wouldnt do it anymore. try to memorize your lyrics as soon as possible so that you can focus on your conductor. his/her every moves. yup. i teach you basic stuffs, but this are the stuffs that all of you, will always do and forget. if you can perfect this kind of basics, then i think you'll be a lot better than last time.
so i already foresee things like lack of discipline during practices and distractions, and these things can easily get you angry. especially when ppl dont listen to you, you have to keep raising up your voice. maybe until u can loose your voice too. and one more thing, complaints. members will tend to complain about stuffs like hungry, or tired. or something else, well, that i understand. so to all you who are singing on song fest. pls dont complain, or get distracted or wander around with your chats or gossips. if its hard enough for u to come for practice, its even harder for the person in charge and the conductor to come for practice. especially when all you dont listen. so be more considerate. and the last thing that i want to do is to scold my members, but i gotta say, they're making it awfully difficult.
and always remember song fest are for saving souls, and praising God. not for your own glory.
and of course some TIPS, would be great wouldn't it? ok, guys, always remember, sing from your diaphragm. dont sing from your throat or your nose, if u sing from ur nose, you will sound like a duck, if you sing from ur throat, you sound like you're being strangled.
and i know you guys would always forget to use ur diaphragm. and of coz, know and understand the lyrics, know what you're singing, and why are you singing, set. your. motives. right.
and expressions, happy for happy songs, hopeful, sad, brave. and of course the sound of your voice, when your voice have to be powerful, the only way is your diaphragm. if u use ur throat. you'll sound like shouting. and that wouldnt be very nice. and for sopranos, make sure every high notes you reach, make sure your voice is ROUND. if its sharp and squeeky like a rubber duck, that thats not really pleasent to the judges's ears.
and last, this is very important, get used to looking at your CONDUCTOR! coz he/she will be giving you the counts of when to come in and all. and your expressions you voice so even when you're practicing, dont hold the paper up high until it cover's ur face. my members does that alot. and if they would even listen to me, they wouldnt do it anymore. try to memorize your lyrics as soon as possible so that you can focus on your conductor. his/her every moves. yup. i teach you basic stuffs, but this are the stuffs that all of you, will always do and forget. if you can perfect this kind of basics, then i think you'll be a lot better than last time.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Leechoo's drawing. AHAHHAHAHAH!
was chatting with Leechoo about my lunch today: SUBWAY!!! today's sub-of-the-day is really yummy~! so i think i'll reserve my every monday's lunch for subway~ ahahahahha
Closer
have you ever noticed? that broken families are much more closer than families that are perfect. and what i meant about perfect and broken is:
Broken - only have mom OR dad.
Perfect - has both the parents.
why do i say so? coz this is what i observed. and im not saying ppl who has perfect family is not close, but the percentage is really low. if you're one of the lucky ones. then its really good for you. ok back to my topic, why do i say so?:
well, simply because they are going through problems together as a family. and they will tend to talk a lot about what happened, and how did they become as perfect and then broken family. me and my mom talked a lot about my dad. so even i dun really communicate with my dad a lot last time, i already know what kind of person he is.
and the children will have to help their mom or dad out, in doing chores and stuff. so naturally they will become closer. like my family, we argued a lot in the past days. and though my family wasnt perfect to begin with, as a child, i dont really like both my parents. coz, when my dad come back, he will go to bed. and when my mom is home she will scold and punish us for not cleaning up the house. until my dad left, things got worse, and when my mom started to get sick, even more worse. and when she recovered, things got a lot better. she starts to joke, laugh, talk. not much of arguements now.
we learn to communicate, slove problems, and share or own feelings about each other too. so i guess having a broken family is not so bad after all. LOL. at least, im really happy now. and of course, if having a really nice dad would be great too.
Broken - only have mom OR dad.
Perfect - has both the parents.
why do i say so? coz this is what i observed. and im not saying ppl who has perfect family is not close, but the percentage is really low. if you're one of the lucky ones. then its really good for you. ok back to my topic, why do i say so?:
well, simply because they are going through problems together as a family. and they will tend to talk a lot about what happened, and how did they become as perfect and then broken family. me and my mom talked a lot about my dad. so even i dun really communicate with my dad a lot last time, i already know what kind of person he is.
and the children will have to help their mom or dad out, in doing chores and stuff. so naturally they will become closer. like my family, we argued a lot in the past days. and though my family wasnt perfect to begin with, as a child, i dont really like both my parents. coz, when my dad come back, he will go to bed. and when my mom is home she will scold and punish us for not cleaning up the house. until my dad left, things got worse, and when my mom started to get sick, even more worse. and when she recovered, things got a lot better. she starts to joke, laugh, talk. not much of arguements now.
we learn to communicate, slove problems, and share or own feelings about each other too. so i guess having a broken family is not so bad after all. LOL. at least, im really happy now. and of course, if having a really nice dad would be great too.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Taylor Lautner
AHAHHAHA!!! why him all the sudden? well coz he is really gorgeous! just watched Twilight Eclipse, from New Moon i already like him a lot, not because of his body of coz.. but because of his boyish looks.. i like guys with this kind of looks. hehehehe and he's kindda perfect for my dream guy in the movie~
im not much into muscel-man type.. and he is obviously a freakishly large man. k la... i just like his character in the movie... very loving ^^... hehehe just let me daydream awhile~~ lalalalalalal~
Something to Ponder about...
Have you ever had a friend your age died? or maybe a friend that you really care so so so much about? maybe you been to funeral but never cried? well, apart from my dad's funeral, raymond's funeral is the 1st funeral that i cried on, then my dad's
i never though a friend my age would die so soon. well, this happened last year, he was my secondary school friend, and at the form 5 i think, he dropped out of school, before that he was really good, and even that time he turned bad, he still treated me very good. then we stop keeping in touch after we gradutated High School. then last year, one Sunday morning. another friend called which is also my guy best friend, 3 of us are really close, called me and tell me the news that he is dead.
i was really blur and stun and i didnt cry until during half of Sunday worship singsparation i started to "wake up". i didnt know why i was feeling like that earlier... but i didnt sing and i wasnt paying attention throughout the whole worship. then i keep asking God, is it my fault that he is going to Hell? i did try asking him to come to church, and when he came, he didnt like it. and left and didnt wanna come again.. so is it my fault?
i did try to ask him to come to church for the 2nd time but he always refused and i gave up trying.. so its my fault right? the more i think the more i wanted to cry, and i HATE to cry in front of other ppl, even ppl who are close to me, or even my parents. so i just tahan and tahan and i keep distracting myself from thinking... and then i failed.. i cried... and i ran upstairs...
then i keep thinking, all these while i been taking him for granted, didnt really appreciate him. he died in a gangster fight. i tried to stop him from joining them. but what can a girl do? so i think that i failed to stop him, i failed to bringing him to church. just because i keep giving up on him. im not emo recently because of this. but dunno why, just suddenly, he popped up in my mind.
i didnt dare to go to his funeral, coz according to my friend, he had an ugly death... and i didnt dare to face him.. so i had to sort out my feelings, after crying so much, i knew i had to stop and put up a smile so that no one worries about me. so, recently this other guy friend who called me, called me again, and asked if i wanted to go to his grave.. coz he didnt go to his funeral either. LOL. and i agreed just the 2 of us.
i dont know what made me to think about this, but all i want to say is, do you wanna regret like i did? no right? especially if you really have a close friend, and dont you guys ever think you have a lot of time, for, you wont know how long a life's gonna last. right? think about that, and make a decision.
i never though a friend my age would die so soon. well, this happened last year, he was my secondary school friend, and at the form 5 i think, he dropped out of school, before that he was really good, and even that time he turned bad, he still treated me very good. then we stop keeping in touch after we gradutated High School. then last year, one Sunday morning. another friend called which is also my guy best friend, 3 of us are really close, called me and tell me the news that he is dead.
i was really blur and stun and i didnt cry until during half of Sunday worship singsparation i started to "wake up". i didnt know why i was feeling like that earlier... but i didnt sing and i wasnt paying attention throughout the whole worship. then i keep asking God, is it my fault that he is going to Hell? i did try asking him to come to church, and when he came, he didnt like it. and left and didnt wanna come again.. so is it my fault?
i did try to ask him to come to church for the 2nd time but he always refused and i gave up trying.. so its my fault right? the more i think the more i wanted to cry, and i HATE to cry in front of other ppl, even ppl who are close to me, or even my parents. so i just tahan and tahan and i keep distracting myself from thinking... and then i failed.. i cried... and i ran upstairs...
then i keep thinking, all these while i been taking him for granted, didnt really appreciate him. he died in a gangster fight. i tried to stop him from joining them. but what can a girl do? so i think that i failed to stop him, i failed to bringing him to church. just because i keep giving up on him. im not emo recently because of this. but dunno why, just suddenly, he popped up in my mind.
i didnt dare to go to his funeral, coz according to my friend, he had an ugly death... and i didnt dare to face him.. so i had to sort out my feelings, after crying so much, i knew i had to stop and put up a smile so that no one worries about me. so, recently this other guy friend who called me, called me again, and asked if i wanted to go to his grave.. coz he didnt go to his funeral either. LOL. and i agreed just the 2 of us.
i dont know what made me to think about this, but all i want to say is, do you wanna regret like i did? no right? especially if you really have a close friend, and dont you guys ever think you have a lot of time, for, you wont know how long a life's gonna last. right? think about that, and make a decision.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
emo's back!
yup.. im back to emo post again, why? i cant tell, at least not in public, but not to anyone also, so im emo, and i cant tell anyone, and i have to bear it myself. why? simply coz i CANNOT tell. not that i dont want to.
come to think of it, its been a very long time since i emo again. so sorry guys, i guess u have to bear with me, and i noticed something, everytime something goes bad in my personal life, everything else gets bad, i know what you guys will say, aiyah, is like that wan, because you're now in a negative emotion right? but no, im serious. things happened around me are really not good.
my group, myself, my studies. everything. and i thought i would be fine. and i can handle this. turns out that i was wrong. im already emotionally unstable. and things around me gets unstable too, its not me who's making it, but it just does!
i can sleep, i cant eat. what else am i to do. forced to be in chargte of song fest, its not that im not happy with it, but ppl just dont cooperate. which actually makes me pissed off lately. and ppl would think its not a big deal. ok i have to stop before it gets ugly... and before i drown all of you with my 'emo-ness'.
come to think of it, its been a very long time since i emo again. so sorry guys, i guess u have to bear with me, and i noticed something, everytime something goes bad in my personal life, everything else gets bad, i know what you guys will say, aiyah, is like that wan, because you're now in a negative emotion right? but no, im serious. things happened around me are really not good.
my group, myself, my studies. everything. and i thought i would be fine. and i can handle this. turns out that i was wrong. im already emotionally unstable. and things around me gets unstable too, its not me who's making it, but it just does!
i can sleep, i cant eat. what else am i to do. forced to be in chargte of song fest, its not that im not happy with it, but ppl just dont cooperate. which actually makes me pissed off lately. and ppl would think its not a big deal. ok i have to stop before it gets ugly... and before i drown all of you with my 'emo-ness'.
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