let me say something, though now im having gastic pain and its very painful. but i still have to throw this out of my chest. for those who are also in the beautiful musical practice you can critic me or whatever u want, i dun care, but i really really need to throw this out of my chest.
im very angry. today supposingly got practice. then i afternoon till now, i got gastric, came home about 4 something, thinking maybe i'll go take a nap. then maybe i will feel better later so i can go for practice la. but when i woke up, the pain still wouldnt go away. so i really very difficult to walk on my feet dy, then i sms-ed the 3 person in charged, apologize for the short notice, and i really cannot come.
the one of them called me. then ask u gastric then why ur sister not coming? then my mom she is a very protective woman. of coz 2 girls going for practice coming home about 12 something, she also not very shong dy. what more 1 daughter? k la, then i heard my sis talking on the phone with one of them while im looking for my gastric medicine and wanted to fill my water bottle. then what i've heard really pisses me off. coz, i fell that non of them would think of our safety. so many cases happening dy, dont they understand a mother's worry?
the another one of them smsed me and he said, "today is the final practice. its not so good. anyways...." again this pissed me off. i know its the final practice. u think i want this gastric?! i ate breakfast and lunch! u think i know what's the cause of this gastric?! u think i dun wanna practice?! im already very very stressed when i have to do ALL the group assignments on my own, with no one helping me. except one person. im already like not enough sleep for the pass 2 weeks, and i still come for practice. and i know after half the time practicing i reallt too tired, cannot really focus, and for that i apologized. and now you guys say as if im not serious about this sketch. im really very very angry and dissapointed lor. we call ourselves brother and sister in Christ. i'd rather dun go on. if not it will sound ugly.
anyways, afternoon when im still having my gastric i was in my friend's house waiting for my mom to fetch me.
Me: sei lo... got gastric. tonight still got practice.
Friend: Dun go la, stay home and rest. if not get worst how?
Me: but today last practice dy ma. so i think i have to go lor.
Friend: you 2 weeks not enough sleep, until can dozed off in class and u still wanna go practice?
Me: like i said lor. last practice ma. not so good lor.
Friend: why? they forced you to go?
Me: no la, maybe, expect me to be there lor. coz last practice
Friend: SO WHAT?! LAST PRACTICE IMPORTANT OR YOUR HEALTH IMPORTANT?!
I REALLY FEEL U VERY STUPID LOR, THEY ARE UR FRIENDS, THEN DUN CARE ABOUT YOU?! YOU CALL THIS FRIEND?
im not insulting anyone here la ok, just to let u guys know, this friend of mine, she is VERY straight with words, so some words when she say to you will actually hurt you, but i got used to it la. and forgive her because she doesnt know why we are doing this sketch for. and after i tell her, because she's not a Christian then she doesnt agree with me la. but she didnt insult la.
after the break up, my whole person feels very lonely, like being abandoned. not only by him, but everyone else also. though everything's different but actually, its the same. do you guy get me? i dun think so. smiles on my face are lessser. good tempers are getting shorter. patience is also getting shorter, anger is growing stronger. self control is also getting weaker. im not blaming anyone else. but im feeling very different. since the break up. i wanna rest. aching like hell now. i'll end my post here. goodbye.
No comments:
Post a Comment